Filling the void

3 years have passed since I came to this college and I must say, I haven't been able to find a true friend- one whom I can trust blindly, without having to worry about anything. I still have long chats with my school friends and the one point that crops up every time is that the lacunae left behind remains. The situation is same on his side, and he says that in the college, everyone's a professional, and professionals can never be true friends. May be, but it really pains me to find being surrounded by hypocrites. In these 3 years, the only sweet memories that I cherish is of MD and probably the only group I am comfortable with is again our MD group.

My roommate often complains that I am quite a reserved person, but then that's because I don't open up too soon to anyone. I prefer giving time to a relationship and I open up only when I trust the person fully. To this effect. I wold like to add that he(my best friend) is probably the only person who knows all aspects of my life. There are other reasons too. Often my views are too radical and I consider it best to keep them to myself. Then, I also don't like mixing various lives. Yes, I hate discussing what I did at class once I am at room, or may be what I did at some party once I am back from there. Only if its too interesting will you find me discussing about it with a person totally ignorant of the situation. My sister is in the habit of shouting aloud what happened at her office and I hate that too.

All these and many more things and I find that I don't have anyone to turn to, to speak my heart out. I cherish my school memories and wish to return back to those days of innocence. But alas! That's not possible. You cant tell your best friend everything through chats as I find it quite cumbersome. So, now, I turn to this after 1 failed attempt in the first year once again, to speak my Heart out and fill the void thats killing me.